Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
