drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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