is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
