Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
