she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Randomize
