He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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