We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize
