Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
