Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Randomize
