just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
