how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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