there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
