My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Randomize
