my mouth tastes like poor choices
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
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