If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
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