help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
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