Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Randomize
