ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Panties = found
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
