Got a toothbrush?
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
