There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize
