how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
worst night to have a conscience
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I didn't notice because vodka
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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