Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
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