:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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