Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Randomize
