He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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