it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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