Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
