how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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