found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
