So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
