Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
