i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
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