There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
