At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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