i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
