battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
