Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
