Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Randomize
