check it out our google latitudes are spooning
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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