i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
