you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
