well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
