you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
