I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
