i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
