i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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