right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Randomize
