508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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