WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize
