her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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