You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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